Thursday, November 15, 2007

Alone or not Alone- that is the question

So yesterday, I dropped my son off at daycare and went to work. Nothing out of the ordinary, I admit. But then I got out of work, picked up my daughter from school, dropped her friend off at her house, picked up another friend that was coming over and dropped them off at my house. Then I went to the grocery store and picked up stuff for dinner.

I called Brian and found out he was going to pick up Austin from daycare. Great, a little time to myself! And I was going to see the Uconn women basketball game tonight too. I went home and the girls were out taking a walk in the neighborhood. So I started dinner and watched a little Oprah’s show on Love Stories. Side note… boy do Brian and I look like love losers compared to these people, a love note every day for 28 years. But I digress… let’s see, where was I? Oh yeah, a little time to myself…so everything was ready to be cooked but no one was home yet so I waited to start the actual heating part.

The girls got back and were playing Life in Haley’s room. Brian called and said he was still closing his shop. I was leaving for the game at 5:30 so he wasn’t going to be home before I left.

So I was a little happy I wasn’t going to have to do all the cooking, bath time and putting to bed chores that I sometimes don’t feel like doing. Don’t get me wrong, I do like some of it and wouldn’t change things if I could but truth be told cleaning dishes after dinner is not all that exciting to me. Call me wild, but dishes…not my idea of a fun time.

So I go to the game, which by the way was a total blow out but I still loved it, and have fun with my sister cheering on the girls to victory.

I get home, the lights are out, everyone is asleep and it dawns on me…I hate this. I didn’t get to give anyone hugs or kisses goodnight except on the cheek because they were already asleep. Yes, I had a good time but I missed MY family. The hustle and bustle of getting ready for the next day, brushing teeth, “I’m hungry”, “I need a drink” stall tactics, all of it. I missed it. Then I think “I am losing my mind”. How often do you get a peaceful night like this? Then it becomes clear as mud, I have no idea what I want. Or maybe I just want it all.

Wednesday, November 7, 2007


My brother-in-law came home safe and sound from Iraq a couple of weeks ago. My sister and her family live in Maryland so we finally got down to see him this past weekend. A relaxing and happy weekend was had by all. It was so nice to see my sister so content. It had been a long time since I had seen that.

My brother in law Brian left for his tour of duty in July of 2006. There had been talk about it for months, probably since December 2005, before he actually found out his guard unit was being called up. Around March he got the official word and my sister hadn’t slept since.

I would call her at least once a week to see how she was doing; “surviving” was all she could muster up. Taking care of her two girls, getting through each holiday, birthday and any other event that came up by her self was hard to watch. We made extra trips down there and she came up a couple of extra times but it was still difficult.

The thing with my sister and brother in law is that they are one of those rare couples that get along so well and love each other so much you can feel it when you are near them. You can walk around a corner and they are still sneaking kisses like teenagers, even after being together 16 years. So to say it was a difficult time for my sister is a true understatement. Next time, cut off her right arm, I'm sure that would be easier for her.

Luckily my brother in law wasn’t in direct combat, his specialty is black hawk helicopters and making sure they work properly and overseeing the mechanics. So thankfully he came home in one piece and didn’t have to deal with too much debriefing.

I got a call from her the day after Brian came home as they were having lunch at Hooters, (apparently they have delicious hot wings there, um…, yeah that’s what I would say if I was him!!). She had not sounded so happy and relaxed like that in so long.

Politically correct or not, all I have to say is Thank You God for bringing him home safe.